It’s rude, and it paints you in bad light, especially if you’re talking to the girl you want to date.If you think the only way you can come up with something funny is by making fun of someone else, skip the humor lest you start offending people and turning her off. We’re not saying you should lurk in the shadows, because that would be creepy. Do you believe she (or he) is much more attractive than you are?If so, you may want to give your pursuit a second thought: A variety of research suggests that couples who do not match one another in their approximate levels of physical attractiveness tend to have less successful romantic relationships.She’s the one who makes angels sing and pluck their harps as she moves. He seems like the regular Joe, but he’s married to a gorgeous hottie!Her every step, her every move, seems perfectly cultivated by the gods of Olympus. Like all the rest of the men graced by her presence, you’ve also been struck by cupid’s deadly bow. Just because you look like the average Joe, doesn’t mean dating her is completely out of the question. So now that we’ve increased your confidence a bit, you can proceed with the next steps for dating the girl who’s out of your league.Therefore, we are more likely to initiate and try to maintain a relationship with a potential partner who matches our own level of physical attractiveness (Ha et al., 2010; Shaw Taylor et al., 2011).When I was a child, my father used to sing us a song which went, “If you want to be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife…” (Soul, 1963).
With the lyrics in mind—and the relevant research in hand—my colleagues and I examined this phenomenon ourselves (Fugère et al., 2015).Research suggests that partners who one another in physical attractiveness—two moderately attractive, highly attractive, or unattractive individuals—are more likely to stay together over the long term than couples who are less similar in attractiveness (Feingold, 1988).Although we generally find particular good-looking individuals to be attractive, we also (correctly if not consciously) intuit that we will have a more successful relationship if our partner matches our own level of physical attractiveness (Montoya, 2008).Looks fade, but a sense of humor sticks around for the long haul.Women in general are suckers for guys who can make them laugh. It’s the social panacea that can get you closer to tons of other people.